Am I Like Judas?

 

 The blog this week is from the weekly note that I send to the parents of St. Pius X Catholic School.

 

 

The Gospel at this week's school Mass was the story of Judas Iscariot betraying Jesus.  For 30 pieces of silver, and a simple kiss on the cheek, Judas presented Jesus to those who wanted Him crucified.  In Fr. Jim's homily, he asked the question, "What was going on in Judas's life that would make him want to do this?"  Kind of makes me wonder, as well.  Fr. Jim's question got me to thinking...  In what parts of my life have I been more like Judas? 

 

Was Judas greedy, and given an offer he could not refuse?  It forced me to reflect on the times where I could have been more giving of my time, talents, and treasure.  What opportunities did I overlook helping another with my time?  Was there an opportunity in which I could have donated some money to someone in need and instead I looked away?

 

Was Judas jealous of all the attention Jesus was getting?  Remember, the townspeople were laying palm on the streets as Jesus entered into town.  So I wondered, when was I jealous of a colleague?  When was I jealous of something a friend has, that I wish I could have?

 

Was Judas afraid for his life and given an alternative to betray Jesus or die?  While I have never been in a "rebuke Jesus or die situation," have there been times where I kept my thoughts and feelings of faith to myself, in fear of retribution?  Have there been times where I missed an opportunity to evangelize the Good News out of cowardice?

 

This list could go on and on because, and as I often say, "I am a sinner, striving to be a saint."  There is, however, one thing that I understand, that maybe Judas did not.  No matter what I do or say, no matter how often I act more like Judas, Jesus will always forgive, if I ask.  While Judas was a witness to the forgiving heart of Jesus, maybe his heart was not in the right place when he decided to betray Jesus, just like my heart is not in the right place when I think of myself instead of helping others.  Every time I am like Judas, I know that all I have to do is seek out God's forgiveness.  As we enter into the last few days of Holy Week, I pray that I will recognize situations and choose to act like Jesus and not Judas.  But if I don't, I hope I recognize the errs of my ways and recognize that I need God's forgiveness.